Yesterday, I attended my first company training day on equality and diversity. What really stood out... it is against the law for British employers to use positive action, better known as affirmative action, in diverisfying their workforce. Employers can advertise information about a job to a specific group of individuals (women, different races), but they can not actively seek or hire specific individuals to fit a quota. Everyone in theory has equal footing to obtain a postion, regardless if a whole workforce is of one race, nationality and gender. I really want to say something sarcastic and delve deeper into the issue, but I will leave it alone for now.
Last night Kate (landlady), The Critter, Patrick (co-worker), Lynn (co-worker/friend) and I went out to a local nightclub that is sooooo up to date that they played Vanilla Ice (when is the last damn time ole Van Winkle put out a song), Kris Kros, Will Smith, Roy Oribison, and Queen. Oh yeah, I did hear one 50 cent song, but that is a big whoop! The Critter did shake his tail feather a bit last night, except the Vanilla Ice song made him race from the dance floor back to his seat. The sad part is that Kate and Patrick were MIA from the club. We were supposed to meet up with them but kept missing each other. They were looking outside the club for us, while we were looking inside.
My highlights from the night included:
1. The semi-strip show I received from a bloke and being the generous woman that I am; I promptly deposited £1 into the front of his pants. I did get my £1 back which was good, because he wasn't that great of a dancer. His ass was cute, had big broad shoulders, and for the rest of the night he kept asking me to dance. The initial reason I paid him any attention was due to a floor show (aka grinding, ass-grabbing) between him and some woman he just met that blocked my view from seeing the rest of the dance floor.
2. I met two black women in the club (total black women in the club=3) that we ended up sitting next to. One of them became jealous when my stripper dude started paying me attention. She told me "he likes you, not me and my hair is real." What the fuck? The heifer had the nerve to pout in the corner of the booth. Needless to say she ended up liking The Critter and proceeded to start a floor show of her own with him. She told him at one point that he looked just like her 9 yr old son. Double fricking Ugh!!!
3. Those of you that have known me for a while, know that I do unexpected shit. So embarassment does not fit into the equation. Lynn went out for the first time with me last night and physically hid under the table when she realized that I was bringing a guy that she thought was cute, back to the table. The guy turned out later to be a jerk and The Critter and I had to step in to protect our little flower from danger. I told the guy straight up that she was no longer interested and The Critter gave him a nudge to drive the point home. Regulators Mount Up!!!
British Words Learned
"cook tea"- Is a phrase used when someone says that they are making dinner or supper. If somone invites you over for tea, it may not just be tea and biscuits, it might be a full course meal. There are different times to have tea, dinner or supper and some folks use them interchangeably.
knackered- tired
bloke- a guy
blinding- really good "That bloke's ass was blinding"
partner- someone your in a relationship with or married to
Ok, so here's the story line. Roughly 1 year ago, an amazing woman from South Central Los Angeles decided after receiving her Master's degree to expand her horizons and venture off to London. So over the course of the next couple of years she will hope to bring two continents together through the eloquence of her words...ok that is complete and utter bullshit! Your not doing shit so just stay a minute for the hell of it!
Location: In a London borough not far away from 3 tube lines, England
About me: 1. Lover of all things Chocolate 2. Terrified of Texas flying Tree Roaches 3. New lover of roundabouts 4. The world is my oyster...w/out the fishy smell 5. God, does not like ugly...so rearrange yourself and your face
